336.5
Up 5 lbs since the last time I weighed, 2 weeks ago. I just didn't want to know last week. Not so thrilled with this week, either, but it is about what I expected. I'm sure anyone reading this is getting tired of seeing me post about refocusing, again, but that's what I'm doing, again. And I am revising my 40x40 goal. My birthday is in 6 weeks. I can't lose 36 lbs by then. Even if I had that kind of discipline, I would be hurting myself. And if I did have that kind of discipline, I wouldn't be where I am. So I am shooting for 20 lbs. And that will be 40 lbs total, since October 2005. Not so much, really, but at least the right direction.
I did 100 crunches last night. I plan to do some sort of exercise tonight; not sure what. I know exercise is key to me losing weight, but I just haven't wanted to lately. So I haven't. Back to the discipline again. Which has also been the focus of my devotional time this last week. Part of my reading is in Proverbs, and everything I've been journaling about is discipline. So maybe that's an indication of good things to come.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Monday, May 21, 2007
5/21/07
Still haven't gotten those rocks moved to the front of the house...
On Saturday, I worked at a Habitat for Humanity build in West Terre Haute. The site supervisor wisely put me in the group not involved with installing windows and doors, or anything that took any actual skills. I shovelled and leveled dirt in the back for the deck, and helped dig post holes. Manually. (note to self: when we put in our deck, RENT A POWER AUGER!!) Wasn't as sore as I expected the next day, except for my hands. It sure felt like a good work-out. Thought I'd plant flowers and move rocks that afternoon, but for some reason I was pooped, so it will wait.
Altogether, I think I did reasonably well with eating this week-end. And particularly today. We'll see what the scales say Wednesday.
On Saturday, I worked at a Habitat for Humanity build in West Terre Haute. The site supervisor wisely put me in the group not involved with installing windows and doors, or anything that took any actual skills. I shovelled and leveled dirt in the back for the deck, and helped dig post holes. Manually. (note to self: when we put in our deck, RENT A POWER AUGER!!) Wasn't as sore as I expected the next day, except for my hands. It sure felt like a good work-out. Thought I'd plant flowers and move rocks that afternoon, but for some reason I was pooped, so it will wait.
Altogether, I think I did reasonably well with eating this week-end. And particularly today. We'll see what the scales say Wednesday.
Friday, May 18, 2007
5/18/07
A little progress, a little regression today. And I choose to be okay with that.
Had a REALLY nummy breakfast souffle thingie from Panera this morning. Could have eaten more than one, but I was full, so I didn't need too. Then, while walking past the break room to go to the bathroom, saw all the delicious free food sitting there. More souffles, bagels, fruit and stuff. But I wasn't hungry. So while in the bathroom, I prayed (I do a lot of my prayer there--quiet, solitary--God knows what I'm in there for, so I figure he doesn't care where I'm at!) to resist the food, and eat again when I was full. And I did resist! Yay me! When I was hungry again, I did have 1/2 a souffle. I had salad for lunch, and stopped when I was full, instead of eating it all because it is a "good" food. And since I wanted something sweet to finish the meal, I had fruit instead of some gooey breakfast thing still leftover. Reasonable snack after work, too.
Now to the regression. It was really busy and stressful at work today, and I even said out loud that I'd like to binge, because of the stress. But I decided (also said out loud) that I could still make good choices. Good to start with. But then for supper, I made spaghetti and turkey meatballs. The bad part was the ENTIRE loaf of garlic bread I ate. We stopped at a local spaghetti shop and got 2 loaves of their garlic bread to go with dinner; 1 for each of us. I knew I shouldn't have, but wanted it so I did it anyway.
2/3rds of the day was full of good choices. That is progress, and I will continue with my progress. I can't break 39 years of bad habits in a couple of weeks. But I will break them, in time and with God's help. Again, I choose to be okay with today.
(Okay, I just looked at the nutritional info for the souffle I had. UGH! But fat make food taste good, and it was DELICIOUS!)
Had a REALLY nummy breakfast souffle thingie from Panera this morning. Could have eaten more than one, but I was full, so I didn't need too. Then, while walking past the break room to go to the bathroom, saw all the delicious free food sitting there. More souffles, bagels, fruit and stuff. But I wasn't hungry. So while in the bathroom, I prayed (I do a lot of my prayer there--quiet, solitary--God knows what I'm in there for, so I figure he doesn't care where I'm at!) to resist the food, and eat again when I was full. And I did resist! Yay me! When I was hungry again, I did have 1/2 a souffle. I had salad for lunch, and stopped when I was full, instead of eating it all because it is a "good" food. And since I wanted something sweet to finish the meal, I had fruit instead of some gooey breakfast thing still leftover. Reasonable snack after work, too.
Now to the regression. It was really busy and stressful at work today, and I even said out loud that I'd like to binge, because of the stress. But I decided (also said out loud) that I could still make good choices. Good to start with. But then for supper, I made spaghetti and turkey meatballs. The bad part was the ENTIRE loaf of garlic bread I ate. We stopped at a local spaghetti shop and got 2 loaves of their garlic bread to go with dinner; 1 for each of us. I knew I shouldn't have, but wanted it so I did it anyway.
2/3rds of the day was full of good choices. That is progress, and I will continue with my progress. I can't break 39 years of bad habits in a couple of weeks. But I will break them, in time and with God's help. Again, I choose to be okay with today.
(Okay, I just looked at the nutritional info for the souffle I had. UGH! But fat make food taste good, and it was DELICIOUS!)
Thursday, May 17, 2007
5/17/07
331.4
Not a lot, but downward, so I'm satisfied.
I've been eating past full for the last few days. I've done better today, though. And I actually exercised last night. I did 3 sets 15 each of isolation biceps curls and overhead triceps extensions, both with 10lb weights, and shoulder press and side arm raise with 5lb weights. Tonight we're going to mow, and possible move some rocks for a border in front of the house.
Not a lot, but downward, so I'm satisfied.
I've been eating past full for the last few days. I've done better today, though. And I actually exercised last night. I did 3 sets 15 each of isolation biceps curls and overhead triceps extensions, both with 10lb weights, and shoulder press and side arm raise with 5lb weights. Tonight we're going to mow, and possible move some rocks for a border in front of the house.
Monday, May 14, 2007
5/14/07
Well, I'm in the wait list group, or control group, for the study, not the weight loss group. I'm kind of bummed, but I will still get the opportunity to do the program in 10 months or so. And I still get paid. I will go in for more paperwork and blood work periodically. And when they offer me the chance to do the program, I intend to take it. I'm still going to work with the intuitive eating thing, so far as I know it. But I need to check and see if I can actually research it on my own, or if I should just go with what I already know.
For the good news, I'm down 1lb over the week-end. And that's even after I ate breakfast. That's 2 week-ends in a row now that I've either lost or stayed the same. Not much of a streak, yet, but I intend to stretch it out!
Had our first rehearsal for the Terre Haute Community Band tonight. I play French horn, and it has been at least 8 years since I played with any regularity. I think my mouthpiece may be permanently embedded in my lips! I had a lot of fun! Forgot what a work-out it is. We rehearsed for 2 hours. I got a little winded in the last half-hour, and my left arm is really tired. I really expected my right arm, which supports the weight of the horn, to be worse. We rehearse each Monday, and we have concerts every other Saturday evening starting June 9.
For the good news, I'm down 1lb over the week-end. And that's even after I ate breakfast. That's 2 week-ends in a row now that I've either lost or stayed the same. Not much of a streak, yet, but I intend to stretch it out!
Had our first rehearsal for the Terre Haute Community Band tonight. I play French horn, and it has been at least 8 years since I played with any regularity. I think my mouthpiece may be permanently embedded in my lips! I had a lot of fun! Forgot what a work-out it is. We rehearsed for 2 hours. I got a little winded in the last half-hour, and my left arm is really tired. I really expected my right arm, which supports the weight of the horn, to be worse. We rehearse each Monday, and we have concerts every other Saturday evening starting June 9.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
5/13/07
Happy Mother's Day!
Did real well with my eating yesterday. Went with my friend Kelly for breakfast at Cracker Barrel, then some shopping. Usually, when I go to Cracker Barrel, I automatically order something with biscuits and gravy. I loves me some biscuits and gravy! But it felt too heavy yesterday morning, so I got Eggs in a Basket, with turkey sausage and hash brown casserole. Ate slowly while chatting w/Kelly, and enjoyed my food, and felt full, not stuffed. A nice feeling! Eating that way continued the rest of the day.
I finally got some exercise in! We took a lovely walk on the National Road Heritage Trail. We went out the trail head in Seelyville, for a change of scenery. And it is nicely shaded, which will be great later this summer when it is warmer. Below are some pics from that excursion.
I think it would be a cool idea to allow graffiti artists to decorate the bottom of the overpasses, not just along the trail but all over town. There are some talented artists out there, and the city could sponsor a contest or something. I'm sure it would be hard to prevent other people from covering up the artwork, but I think it's a good idea to look into.Friday, May 11, 2007
5/11/07--part 2
Did pretty well with the intuitive eating today. It was cool to be hungry, eat one (only one!) chocolate chip cookie, and not have to feel bad about it. And, at lunch, I had a chicken salad sandwich and some steamed broccoli, and 1 serving spoon full of mac and cheese. Not a ton. And I was happy with that. Mac and cheese can be a huge binge starter for me.
Went for my paperwork and interview for the weight loss study this afternoon. TONS of paperwork. How do you feel about this, that and the other. Then an interview about some of my answers. I go Monday morning for my blood work. Unless something is wonky with that, I will be in the study. And I'll find out Monday morning before I leave which group I'm in; weight loss or wait list. I hope the weight loss group, but either will be fine.
Went for my paperwork and interview for the weight loss study this afternoon. TONS of paperwork. How do you feel about this, that and the other. Then an interview about some of my answers. I go Monday morning for my blood work. Unless something is wonky with that, I will be in the study. And I'll find out Monday morning before I leave which group I'm in; weight loss or wait list. I hope the weight loss group, but either will be fine.
5/11/07
331.8
Down 3.3 lbs from last weeks official weigh-in. So the intuitive eating must be working. I am especially happy that I did not gain over the week-end. I need to make time for more exercise, and stop making excuses. Tuesday night, I mowed the front yard for my exercise. It was very hot, but we waited until about 7, and it had cooled down nicely.
I'm trying again to eat more fruit and veggies. I've actually been wanting veggies lately. Monday night we ordered out, and instead of a calzone, I actually wanted a salad. I picked up some oranges and apples yesterday to snack on.
Typed the above on Wednesday. The last few days I've experienced the normal struggles. Trying to break the habit of eating past full. And of eating on auto-pilot. Exercise is a struggle, too. I'm not working out at lunch, and I don't work out at home because I'm too tired or have other stuff to do. I need to 1)get more sleep, and B)stop making excuses and just do it.
Down 3.3 lbs from last weeks official weigh-in. So the intuitive eating must be working. I am especially happy that I did not gain over the week-end. I need to make time for more exercise, and stop making excuses. Tuesday night, I mowed the front yard for my exercise. It was very hot, but we waited until about 7, and it had cooled down nicely.
I'm trying again to eat more fruit and veggies. I've actually been wanting veggies lately. Monday night we ordered out, and instead of a calzone, I actually wanted a salad. I picked up some oranges and apples yesterday to snack on.
Typed the above on Wednesday. The last few days I've experienced the normal struggles. Trying to break the habit of eating past full. And of eating on auto-pilot. Exercise is a struggle, too. I'm not working out at lunch, and I don't work out at home because I'm too tired or have other stuff to do. I need to 1)get more sleep, and B)stop making excuses and just do it.
Monday, May 07, 2007
5/7/07
Weighed in today, just to see. I weighed the same as on Thursday, which was a couple of pounds less than the official weigh-in on Wednesday. I take that as a good sign, and that the more "intuitive" approach I'm taking is working, since I normally see a gain after the week-end.
Ate well today. Although I really need to get past this "good" and "bad" thing. But I'll probably always find some way to quantify or define it. Anyhow, let myself get a little too hungry at the end of the work day, but when I got home, after a little shopping, (BTW, I got a pair of black capris at Fashion Bug for $5.71 after 30% off and a $10 off coupon!!!!) I had a pb&j on 1 slice of bread. I figured if that didn't do the trick, I could always get another. But it did the trick nicely!
I'll be at the South office a long time tomorrow. We have patients scheduled until noon, so if I get out of there by 1, I'll be doing good. I need to make sure to take snackage, and probably my lunch. I got some frozen fruit out to defrost for a snack or maybe breakfast, and I have a banana this is just this side of too ripe, so I need to eat it tomorrow.
For what will pass as exercise tonight, we pulled ivy from around the foundation/out from under the siding. Tomorrow, we're going to mow, and probably pull some more ivy.
Ate well today. Although I really need to get past this "good" and "bad" thing. But I'll probably always find some way to quantify or define it. Anyhow, let myself get a little too hungry at the end of the work day, but when I got home, after a little shopping, (BTW, I got a pair of black capris at Fashion Bug for $5.71 after 30% off and a $10 off coupon!!!!) I had a pb&j on 1 slice of bread. I figured if that didn't do the trick, I could always get another. But it did the trick nicely!
I'll be at the South office a long time tomorrow. We have patients scheduled until noon, so if I get out of there by 1, I'll be doing good. I need to make sure to take snackage, and probably my lunch. I got some frozen fruit out to defrost for a snack or maybe breakfast, and I have a banana this is just this side of too ripe, so I need to eat it tomorrow.
For what will pass as exercise tonight, we pulled ivy from around the foundation/out from under the siding. Tomorrow, we're going to mow, and probably pull some more ivy.
Sunday, May 06, 2007
5/6/07
Slept in today, then made brunch. Scrambled eggs w/turkey ham, mushrooms, and potatoes. Only had 3 eggs, so it was more stuff w/scrambled eggs than scrambled eggs w/stuff. And 2 slices whole wheat toast. Then we went for a walk in the beautiful weather.
Did well all day with mindful eating. Ate when I was hungry, and didn't eat to the point of being uncomfortable. Pleasantly full, or maybe a little past that at supper. Something new for me today, though. I left food in the skillet and pan at brunch and supper. Normally, because it is there, I will eat it. I've been trying to put in to practice the thought that if I want more, it will still be there. And usually I'm satisfied with what I have on my plate. Also, I had bread and butter for supper, and I only ate about 1/2 a slice.
Did well all day with mindful eating. Ate when I was hungry, and didn't eat to the point of being uncomfortable. Pleasantly full, or maybe a little past that at supper. Something new for me today, though. I left food in the skillet and pan at brunch and supper. Normally, because it is there, I will eat it. I've been trying to put in to practice the thought that if I want more, it will still be there. And usually I'm satisfied with what I have on my plate. Also, I had bread and butter for supper, and I only ate about 1/2 a slice.
Friday, May 04, 2007
5/4/07
The mindful eating, intuitive eating, has been going well. I've been trying to pay attention to when I'm hungry, and how I'm hungry, and eat accordingly. I've been pretty successful at slowing down, too. I did eat too much at lunch today, right past satisfied and full, and on to a little uncomfortable. This will take some practice.
I have stopped reading Eating Mindfully and reading the e-mail I signed up for, though. I got a call from ISU about the study I called about. From the sounds of it, it will involve some of the same principles, and when I mentioned the book, the lady said to stop reading it at this point. I don't think I've read enough to disqualify me from the study. It is a NIH study, and will involve 10 weeks of meetings, and then follow up for 10 months. The is a study group and a wait list group, and even the wait list group gets the opportunity to do the program after the 10 months, so it's a win/win situation. And everyone gets paid $160. I go for interview/paperwork on next Friday, and lab work the following Monday. The program starts the next day, so I guess I'll find out that day or the next if I'm in or not. I'll keep you posted.
I have stopped reading Eating Mindfully and reading the e-mail I signed up for, though. I got a call from ISU about the study I called about. From the sounds of it, it will involve some of the same principles, and when I mentioned the book, the lady said to stop reading it at this point. I don't think I've read enough to disqualify me from the study. It is a NIH study, and will involve 10 weeks of meetings, and then follow up for 10 months. The is a study group and a wait list group, and even the wait list group gets the opportunity to do the program after the 10 months, so it's a win/win situation. And everyone gets paid $160. I go for interview/paperwork on next Friday, and lab work the following Monday. The program starts the next day, so I guess I'll find out that day or the next if I'm in or not. I'll keep you posted.
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
5/2/07
335.1
Not surprised there. I hope some is related to my period, but it is more likely my eating.
I read some of the information on intuitive eating on-line last night. It makes a lot of sense. My Mindful Eating book was mentioned on one site. I have it with me today, and may read it at lunch. I have my devotions to read first, though.
Today's goals (8:22 am):
64 oz water
controlled portions
slower eating
I won't have time to exercise today as I have ArtReach and rehearsal tonight.
*****************************************************************
So far so good today (4:40pm). Had a 4" subway roast beef sandwich
w/lots of veggies, lite mayo and mustard, and some broccoli salad for
lunch. And a 100 calorie Hershey's wafer bar for desert. Got hungry
again around 4, and had a 90 calorie bag of Quaker Mini Delights, so
that I wouldn't be starving by dinner. I have gotten in all my water,
and will drink more later, too.
*****************************************************************
For dinner, I had 1/2 a thin crust steak fajita pizza. I ate slowly, and was still hungry, so I had some potato sticks w/spicy buffalo dressing. I feel full now, but not stuffed.
I received an e-mail I signed up for about intuitive eating, with steps to start eating that way. I'll read it in the next couple of days.
Not surprised there. I hope some is related to my period, but it is more likely my eating.
I read some of the information on intuitive eating on-line last night. It makes a lot of sense. My Mindful Eating book was mentioned on one site. I have it with me today, and may read it at lunch. I have my devotions to read first, though.
Today's goals (8:22 am):
64 oz water
controlled portions
slower eating
I won't have time to exercise today as I have ArtReach and rehearsal tonight.
*****************************************************************
So far so good today (4:40pm). Had a 4" subway roast beef sandwich
w/lots of veggies, lite mayo and mustard, and some broccoli salad for
lunch. And a 100 calorie Hershey's wafer bar for desert. Got hungry
again around 4, and had a 90 calorie bag of Quaker Mini Delights, so
that I wouldn't be starving by dinner. I have gotten in all my water,
and will drink more later, too.
*****************************************************************
For dinner, I had 1/2 a thin crust steak fajita pizza. I ate slowly, and was still hungry, so I had some potato sticks w/spicy buffalo dressing. I feel full now, but not stuffed.
I received an e-mail I signed up for about intuitive eating, with steps to start eating that way. I'll read it in the next couple of days.
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
5/1/07
Okay, so today is a new day, and I am ready to pick back up and start over again. Yes, I was down on myself last night. But I'll be starting my period soon, too, and that accounts for some of the moodiness.
Goals for today (I'm typing this at 8:25 am):
64 oz water
controlled portion sizes
exercise (yard work, walk, or weights)
***************************************************************
I think I may just be an idiot. I knew I wanted to control my portions today. I took lunch late, and I hadn't eaten a snack, so I was very hungry. I had a pretty large lunch; baked potato w/taco meat and nacho cheese, some nachos (drug rep lunch). That was bad enough. But then I went back for seconds. I knew I was full. I didn't even enjoy it that much. But I did it anyway. What I also did was call one of our local universities, Indiana State, to see about a weight loss study through the psychology department. The ad asks if you feel out of control around food. Sometimes, a lot of the time, yes. It is a 10 week program, with a year of follow up. You could get paid $160. It can't hurt, and it might help. I'm waiting for them to call back.
****************************************************************
So for dinner tonight I had a calzone w/chicken, spinach, mushrooms, tomatoes and cheese, and 2 1/2 bread sticks. A lot of bread, but not out of control. Ate slowly (for me) and enjoyed it. Thought about having some ice cream, but I will pass.
Andrea K. left a comment about intuitive eating. I'm going to do some research and see what that is about.
I have met my water goal. I have met my controlled portion goal for 2 of 3 meals. I'm not going to get in any exercise today.
Goals for today (I'm typing this at 8:25 am):
64 oz water
controlled portion sizes
exercise (yard work, walk, or weights)
***************************************************************
I think I may just be an idiot. I knew I wanted to control my portions today. I took lunch late, and I hadn't eaten a snack, so I was very hungry. I had a pretty large lunch; baked potato w/taco meat and nacho cheese, some nachos (drug rep lunch). That was bad enough. But then I went back for seconds. I knew I was full. I didn't even enjoy it that much. But I did it anyway. What I also did was call one of our local universities, Indiana State, to see about a weight loss study through the psychology department. The ad asks if you feel out of control around food. Sometimes, a lot of the time, yes. It is a 10 week program, with a year of follow up. You could get paid $160. It can't hurt, and it might help. I'm waiting for them to call back.
****************************************************************
So for dinner tonight I had a calzone w/chicken, spinach, mushrooms, tomatoes and cheese, and 2 1/2 bread sticks. A lot of bread, but not out of control. Ate slowly (for me) and enjoyed it. Thought about having some ice cream, but I will pass.
Andrea K. left a comment about intuitive eating. I'm going to do some research and see what that is about.
I have met my water goal. I have met my controlled portion goal for 2 of 3 meals. I'm not going to get in any exercise today.
Monday, April 30, 2007
4/30/07 x2
I could have resisted. But I didn't want to. Or at least not enough. I was a little hungry, but mostly just wanted to eat. So I ate.
If I had resisted, I would have felt like a success. And felt skinny, despite the fact that a couple of hot dog buns, a couple of slices of bologna and 3 slices of cheese didn't make that much difference in my weight either way. But now I feel like a failure. Because I gave in. Is this all about denying myself what I want? I am too quick to give myself what I want right now, without thought for what I want long-term. It all comes back around to discipline, and my lack thereof.
Man, this psychological stuff sucks. Why can't I just not eat? Why does it have to be all head games? Just eat what I need, and no more. Get my lazy butt off the couch and take a walk. AAUUUGGHH!!
If I had resisted, I would have felt like a success. And felt skinny, despite the fact that a couple of hot dog buns, a couple of slices of bologna and 3 slices of cheese didn't make that much difference in my weight either way. But now I feel like a failure. Because I gave in. Is this all about denying myself what I want? I am too quick to give myself what I want right now, without thought for what I want long-term. It all comes back around to discipline, and my lack thereof.
Man, this psychological stuff sucks. Why can't I just not eat? Why does it have to be all head games? Just eat what I need, and no more. Get my lazy butt off the couch and take a walk. AAUUUGGHH!!
4/30/07
Did well with eating today. Did pretty well yesterday, except for the cherry pie and ice cream.
For lunch yesterday, after having a pretty big breakfast at Cracker Barrel, (I had the Sunrise Sampler, which I ate slowly and savored, and stayed full till mid afternoon) I made rice with mushroom soup. I mad a conscious choice to only make 1/2 cup of rice, when I would normally make 1 cup. May not sound like much to you, but it was a decision to eat less. And I'm pretty happy about that!
For lunch yesterday, after having a pretty big breakfast at Cracker Barrel, (I had the Sunrise Sampler, which I ate slowly and savored, and stayed full till mid afternoon) I made rice with mushroom soup. I mad a conscious choice to only make 1/2 cup of rice, when I would normally make 1 cup. May not sound like much to you, but it was a decision to eat less. And I'm pretty happy about that!
Saturday, April 28, 2007
4/28/07
Haven't posted much lately because I haven't been working out much lately, and have been eating pretty poorly. Yesterday wasn't too bad, though. I wanted to eat more after dinner, even though I was full. But I was watching What Not To Wear, and didn't want to get up, and then fell asleep in the recliner afterwards. At any rate, I didn't eat more, so it's all good!
Here's what I'm noticing lately, especially this morning. When I start to eat, I don't want to stop. This morning, I had a bagel w/about 2 oz. reduced fat cream cheese and a sprinkle of Parmesan for breakfast. Good portion, nothing excessive. But when I was done, even though I was satisfied hunger-wise, I wanted more to eat. Specifically, toast slathered in butter. I gave some thought to having some. But I knew I wasn't really hungry, so I stayed in bed, where I was eating breakfast and watching TV (gotta have my Lester Holt on Saturday mornings, don't 'cha know) and didn't eat anything else. I kept thinking about it for awhile, prayed about it, and eventually it passed. So I can resist the urges, it's just that most of the time, I don't.
Not sure what the answer here is. I think if I slow down and savor my food more, it will help with the sensual part of eating. Really pay attention to what I'm eating, how it tastes and feels, and makes me feel. I never did finish that mindful eating book, but that is part of what I read in it. Also, instead of eating whatever is easy, I'm going to try to figure out what I really want. And then take my time with it and really enjoy it.
So, that's just kinda what's going on in my head today. I was thinking about keeping real strict track of what I eat, and sending e-mails home from work to record it, but I don't know if I will or not. I think with me, it is more about my emotions and feelings, or desire to escape them, and it may be more important to study why I eat than what I eat. Yes, of course, I do need to make better choices. But I think the most important choices for me right now are about portions.
Here's what I'm noticing lately, especially this morning. When I start to eat, I don't want to stop. This morning, I had a bagel w/about 2 oz. reduced fat cream cheese and a sprinkle of Parmesan for breakfast. Good portion, nothing excessive. But when I was done, even though I was satisfied hunger-wise, I wanted more to eat. Specifically, toast slathered in butter. I gave some thought to having some. But I knew I wasn't really hungry, so I stayed in bed, where I was eating breakfast and watching TV (gotta have my Lester Holt on Saturday mornings, don't 'cha know) and didn't eat anything else. I kept thinking about it for awhile, prayed about it, and eventually it passed. So I can resist the urges, it's just that most of the time, I don't.
Not sure what the answer here is. I think if I slow down and savor my food more, it will help with the sensual part of eating. Really pay attention to what I'm eating, how it tastes and feels, and makes me feel. I never did finish that mindful eating book, but that is part of what I read in it. Also, instead of eating whatever is easy, I'm going to try to figure out what I really want. And then take my time with it and really enjoy it.
So, that's just kinda what's going on in my head today. I was thinking about keeping real strict track of what I eat, and sending e-mails home from work to record it, but I don't know if I will or not. I think with me, it is more about my emotions and feelings, or desire to escape them, and it may be more important to study why I eat than what I eat. Yes, of course, I do need to make better choices. But I think the most important choices for me right now are about portions.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
4/25/07
331.4
Almost 2 pounds. Yay! My goal for next week is 2 pounds. I want to be back under 330, and then continue to go down.
Stress level is down some today. Or at least I'm coping better. Just felt very overwhelmed yesterday. Today, with the help of prayers and encouragement from dear friends, I know that everything will be alright! (Thanks, girls! Love ya!)
Overate today. Don't want to go into the details. Only exercise was 2 flights of stairs.
Almost 2 pounds. Yay! My goal for next week is 2 pounds. I want to be back under 330, and then continue to go down.
Stress level is down some today. Or at least I'm coping better. Just felt very overwhelmed yesterday. Today, with the help of prayers and encouragement from dear friends, I know that everything will be alright! (Thanks, girls! Love ya!)
Overate today. Don't want to go into the details. Only exercise was 2 flights of stairs.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
4/24/07
Yesterday was a good day. Today has been so far.
Did well with my eating yeserday. Push mowed the yard and did weed-eating for my workout. Our yard isn't that big, but it was the hardest I've worked out in a while!
I've got some stressful junk going on in my life right now (financial stuff, car stuff), but I'm trying not to eat to medicate it. It won't change any situation, and will just make me miserable in the long run. What I've been trying to do when I start to fret, is ask God for help, and then thank Him. Instead of trying to work things out by myself, Let Him do his job, and be thankful. How many times do I get myself in a mess because I run on ahead of what God wants to do? Don't think I can count that high! So to keep from stress eating, I have prayer, and beading. Can't eat with a needle and beads in your hands!
The above was all written from work. At home now, and more stressful car stuff. But it will be okay. I did overeat a little, but not too much. We'll see what the scale shows tomorrow.
Did well with my eating yeserday. Push mowed the yard and did weed-eating for my workout. Our yard isn't that big, but it was the hardest I've worked out in a while!
I've got some stressful junk going on in my life right now (financial stuff, car stuff), but I'm trying not to eat to medicate it. It won't change any situation, and will just make me miserable in the long run. What I've been trying to do when I start to fret, is ask God for help, and then thank Him. Instead of trying to work things out by myself, Let Him do his job, and be thankful. How many times do I get myself in a mess because I run on ahead of what God wants to do? Don't think I can count that high! So to keep from stress eating, I have prayer, and beading. Can't eat with a needle and beads in your hands!
The above was all written from work. At home now, and more stressful car stuff. But it will be okay. I did overeat a little, but not too much. We'll see what the scale shows tomorrow.
Monday, April 23, 2007
4/23/07
Eating was good and bad the last few days. Friday was pretty good. No exercise. Saturday was bad, but took a walk after a lovely nap. (FYI--the Papa John's Italian Meat Trio pizza rocks.) Yesterday, no exercise, and better eating than Saturday, but still too much for dinner.
This evening, I will get some exercise by doing yard work. We need to mow and weed-eat.
Friday was a pretty stressful day, at home and work, and I did manage not to stress eat. Saturday, I think the "I don't cares" came back. I need to keep focused on my goals. 40 is not very far away.
This evening, I will get some exercise by doing yard work. We need to mow and weed-eat.
Friday was a pretty stressful day, at home and work, and I did manage not to stress eat. Saturday, I think the "I don't cares" came back. I need to keep focused on my goals. 40 is not very far away.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
4/19/07
Eating was better today. Ate a little too much at dinner, but made a couple of really good choices at lunch and for an afternoon snack.
It was a little chilly, and Sean & I were both tired, so we did not walk tonight. After supper, though, I felt more energetic, and did 2 sets 15 each of biceps curls, triceps extensions, butterflies and over head press. All with 10 lbs in each hand, except for 5's on the butterflies. And I did 1 set 25 on each side of 3 different thigh/hip exercises. I stretched, too. I felt better, physically and mentally after exercising. I'm sure I'll be sore tomorrow, since it has been so long since I've done any weight training, but it will be worth it!
It was a little chilly, and Sean & I were both tired, so we did not walk tonight. After supper, though, I felt more energetic, and did 2 sets 15 each of biceps curls, triceps extensions, butterflies and over head press. All with 10 lbs in each hand, except for 5's on the butterflies. And I did 1 set 25 on each side of 3 different thigh/hip exercises. I stretched, too. I felt better, physically and mentally after exercising. I'm sure I'll be sore tomorrow, since it has been so long since I've done any weight training, but it will be worth it!
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